Release Day Blitz, Excerpt, Review & #Giveaway: ☆The Reality of You☆ by @JeanHaus

Naomi Porter was once witty, fun, and outgoing, but she has scratched outgoing off the list, along with men. She has a mediocre tech job in fabulous New York, a large smut book collection, and awesome friends, both tangible and in an online gaming community. She just doesn’t date. A future filled with cats and housedresses beats having her heart broken again.

But Naomi still likes men, even kind of stalks—mostly fantasizes about—a gorgeous one at work during lunch.

Her best friend, Kara, is determined that Naomi will be outgoing again. When Kara finds out who, as in a notorious playboy, Naomi is stalking at lunch, she plans to break Naomi of her lunchtime habit and bring her back into the real world. It’s just going to take a bit of deception.

Between all the deceiving, fangirling, and bumbling, Naomi might not be able to resist the temptation of turning her seven-month fantasy into reality. And really, so what if he’s a playboy or a demanding jerk? Her fantasies don’t include love or even like, just a bed or a couch or the back seat of a limo…

Reality might be just what she needs.

*A sexy romantic comedy intended for audiences 18+

~Meet Naomi Porter ~

-They each had some kind of jackass drink: dry martini, cosmopolitan, Manhattan, Caipirini, and one neat, overpriced single malt scotch. Except for me. I drank beer. American beer. From the tap, thank you very much.

-Whoa. Wow. Whoa. Between his gaze and his words, I imagined jumping on his lap and experiencing some of that.
– What was better than fried tortillas? Nothing. Well, except Doritos. But they were fried tortillas with cheese-flavored dusting. 
-Could sharks jump out of the water? The ocean lay more than a hundred feet away. I wanted a shark to swallow me whole and drag me to the deep, salty depths of the sea after that ramble.
– But he is also hot, delicious, and the star of my day and night dreams.
-I didn’t cook. I constructed dips.
-I wanted to grab a toothpick and stuff it up my roommate’s nose. Two toothpicks to be precise, one for each nostril.
– Seriously, I never imagined being a tux girl, but holy hot hell, I could dry hump his suit. Preferably with him in it, but…
-You can never, ever, go wrong with bacon.
– I was going to faint. Or let out a whoop. Or tackle him. And it wasn’t just because he was removing his pants.

“Keep an open mind. First impressions aren’t always correct,” she said from behind me as we strode down the hall.

“I’m not expecting Prince Charming but those three are wham-bam-thank-you-ma’am all the way. Is a little interest, a little romance, a first date with a toe-curling kiss too much to ask for?” I inquired over my shoulder.

“Maybe you need a wham-bam to get back into business. Like get it over, then move on to the romance and the toe-curling kisses.”

“Harrumph,” escaped me before we came out of the hallway and into the main bar. Three steps into the room, I stopped dead in my tracks. I became a deer in headlights when I noticed a person sitting sideways at the bar. Dark brown hair. Square jaw. Dark winged brows. Sensual lips with a rocks glass pressed to them. I gaped as he tipped the glass higher and amber liquid touched his lips.

Kara ran into my shoulder. “What the hell?” she asked, rubbing her jaw and stepping next to me. “Don’t pull this again. It’s only one more drink.”

“It’s him,” I somehow said, though still in shock. “My lunch guy.”

“Him? What are you talking—” She followed my frozen gawk. “Holy shit, Naomi! He’s the guy you watch at lunch? That’s not a bike—that’s a luxury car! Like an Aston Martin!” Kara had a thing for luxury cars. And shoes. And clothes. And purses.

I nodded as the woman next to him gave him a sultry stare. Jealousy flared within in me. Hopefully the daydream kind, but yeah, he was an Aston Martin compared to the three ten speeds waiting in the other room.

Kara smacked her forehead. “I should have known. Why didn’t my stupid ass put two and two together when you described him? You know who he is, right?”

Locked on him, my eyes turned huge. “What? No.”


“Aggggg, not listening to Kara.” I covered my ears. “Don’t tell me.” Sure, I stalked him at lunch, but I didn’t want the possibility of becoming a full-time stalker. More than that, I didn’t want my lunchtime lustful fantasies ruined by reality. I was more than aware of it being a fantasy. I liked it as a fantasy.

4 The Reality turned out Much better than I expected Stars

The reality of you is so much better than anything I’ve ever imagined.

I have been a fan of Jean Haus ever since Ink My Heart. I’ve loved her NA books, so when she let me know she has a new Romantic Comedy in the works, I was just a little excited at the opportunity to read it.

Miss Haus has yet to let me down and this book was certainly no exception. While I can’t really say it was a romantic comedy (I’d call it more of a contemporary romance with a little humor), I still really enjoyed it. I also have to say that the synopsis does not do this book justice at all. It was so much better than I anticipated.
Meet Naomi Porter

Naomi has pretty much given up on men and relationships after her disastrous past relationships. Every man in her life has stopmed on her heart and dumped her, with her most recent ex being the nail in the coffin. After a horrible car crash ruins not only her chance for Olympics but her engagement as well, she’s done. Burying herself in her “safe” world, the last thing she wants is to have her heart broken again

So she makes do with her mediocre job, her online gaming, her friends, her smutty books…and her fantasies. And the recurring star of those fantasies just happens to be the mysterious sexy man that she more or less stalks during her work lunch hour.

She doesn’t know who he is, what he does, or if he’s even single. But he certainly has a nice ass and her imagination can fill in the rest…

Let me recall some of your descriptions of the man. There was ‘Mr. McGriddle, cover that man in sticky maple syrup’. You also described him as ‘tall, dark hot chocolate, give me two cans of whip cream’. And let’s not forget the eloquent, ‘Superpants, able to make a woman cum with a drop of his drawers.”

So her friends also happen to know of her obsession.
Her best friend and roommate is determined to break Naomi out of her rut. But a crush on the mystery man is not the way to go. Especially since her friend Kara knows that the mystery man happens to be the incredibly rich and even bigger asshole with a 3 week relationship minimum, Reese Jordon. And what’s the best way to rid her friend of this crush and finally get her out of her rut and into the real world? Expose her to the true asshole-y potent effect of Reese by getting her a job as his temp for the week during a Puerto Rico work trip. But plans rarely go according to plan.
I knew I’d love Reese at his first asshole remark to Naomi. To say he was a grade A asshole to her would be an understatement. But beyond the asshole and cold businessman there was also an undercurrent of something…more.
I loved Naomi’s bumbling and accident prone quirkiness. I could have done without her “inner fangirl” as it gave me some cold sweat flashbacks to a certain ‘inner goddess’, but it wasn’t too bad. It was even cute at times. Her inner thoughts always managed to put a smile on my face.

I was quite sure that his “secretary” licking him during Pilates would be frowned upon.
She was so endearingly shy yet cute.
I took a sip of wine, and held in a moan. He was going to make me a wino, a big fat wino because I planned on drinking wine with everything now. Doritos, yogurt, dips, pizza…cereal? There had to be a wine that paired with Cocoa Puffs.
The relationship between Naomi and Reese was slow building but filled with plenty of sexual tension. Between lustful fantasies and a few stolen gropes and kisses I was beyond ready for these two to finally get together…and when they did?

Yup. Hawt!
I did get irritated with her friend Kara.

Considering the woman pretty much set the whole thing in motion, she was a grade A bitch about everything. I was hoping she’d redeem herself toward the end of the book, but that ever really happened for me.

So I really wished she would just shut the hell up and stay out of it at times.
As for the rest of it? I really liked it. It was cute, funny and sexy. I really fell for Reese and the way he treated Naomi. Naomi was a great heroine as well. I was not expecting the twist at the end. It caught me completely off guard. And the last chapter was the perfect conclusion. Jean really brought the story a full circle and it was great.
If you’re a fan of fun and sexy contemporary romances, I definitely recommend this one. I really hope Jean Haus has more adult books like this up her sleeve in the future.
**ARC courtesy of author in exchange for an honest review**
I write young adult and romance novels. I read a lot too. I even do a bit of cooking, which is actually quite good. I also golf a lot in the summer with my awesome husband and son, but I cook way, way better than I golf.
I am Represented by Jane Dystel of Dystel & Goderich Literary Management.

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