New Release & Review: ★Suite 269★ by Christine Zolendz

Review- Suite 269
Suite 269
Genre: Contemporary Romance
Author: Christine Zolendz
Release Date: October 4, 2015add-to-goodreads-button3

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Leave your inhibitions at the door and make your fantasies come true.

 

Three weeks.
No rules.
Any fantasy.
Anything goes.

 

Lexa Novak would like nothing better than to let go and finally experience it all, so when the opportunity arises to just do that, she can’t refuse—won’t refuse.
But what happens when your fantasies become your realities?

Find out when you enter Suite 269.

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Review4 starsSuite 269-DGR

My first step into spinsterhood: making innocent children cry. Next up, adopting a dozen cats, buying a big vibrator, and learning the etiquette of prissy repressiveness. God, the bitterness and anger were overwhelming.

Know what I love? When a book manages to catch me by complete surprise, pleasantly so, and end up being so much more than I had thought it would be. Suite 269 was that book for me. Witty, laugh out loud hilarious, and sexy as all hell, I read it in practically one sitting with a goofy smile on my face for the entire time (And some ice for my ovaries on standby) It’s not often that I’ll tell you that my favorite thing about a book was the heroine. And by that, I mean it almost never freaking happens. Unless the heroine manages to channel my inner sarcastic pervert. I mean the woman’s favorite cartoon was Pinky and The Brain for the love of god! We need to be besties here! And if you don’t know what that cartoon is, shame on you, and don’t speak to me again until you watch it, mkay?!

I could swear if I looked on my shoulder in that moment I’d see a horny little devil prodding me with an enormous penis-shaped pitchfork, chanting, “Kiss him. Kiss him. Kiss him.”

What if you met a man that promised to make all your deepest, darkest fantasies come true? No questions, no judgement. That’s precisely the chance that Lexa Novak gets. But this book is so much more than just that. So let’s set the scene, shall we?

Lexa is coming home from her bachelorette party when she walks in on her fiance letting her coworker use his penis as a pogo stick….for her vagina. You get me? He’s cheating on, mkay. So with her pride wounded and her upcoming nuptuals in tatters, Lexa tries to focus on the one thing she still has going for her…her job and the conference she has to attend for it. Even if she has to drown herself in alcohol to get through it.
Enter stage right, Jameson Holt. The son of the man that owns the magazine she works as a lowly fact checker for, and her boss. Did I happen to mention that he makes her ovaries scream in delight with his mere present alone?
Because the man is pure sex on a stick. But that’s all the detail you’ll be getting from because what’s the fun in that? The best part of the reading experience here is to find out how all these puzzle pieces click together.

This was such a fun and sexy read. I was laughing my fool head off for basically the entire first half of the book. Their banter and the text messages alone are enough to make you giggle. But then add into the mix Lexa’s self depreciating and hilarious inner monologue, and you got yourself a hell of a winner. I’d suggest keeping some ice for those ovaries for the second half, however.

While there were parts of the book that were fairly predictable, it never took a thing away from it. At least not from me. I loved it from beginning to finish. It’s not often that I’ll find a book that can appease my inner pervert AND make me laugh all in one.
I’ve read and loved this author’s PNR titles, (Mad World) but this was my first contemporary romance from her and it sure as hell will not be my last. Clearly I’ve been missing out and I need to go check out the woman’s entire backlist. If you’re looking for a fun, witty, and uber sexy read, you really can’t go wrong with this one.

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